50 Horsemen of the Apocalypse, Week 28, Day 5

Okay, so today came and the world didn't end. I'm living proof that turning 50 is okay. Actually, around 11:30 last night I did have a bit of a pity party and cried for awhile. No matter how okay I've been with it all, 50 takes a bit to wrap your head around, and when it came right down to it, I wasn't quite ready to give up being in my 40s. But Adam texted me at 12:16 to wish me happy birthday and then phoned, and I realized how lucky I am to have a kid who would stay up past midnight so he could be the first one to talk to me on my birthday. It's hard to feel sorry for yourself when you're in the middle of being blessed!

I ate well today -- yogurt for breakfast and a tossed salad with grilled chicken for lunch. Dinner was not quite as diet-friendly, but it was very yummy. Mom made chicken and dumplings with carrots. The dumplings, of course, were the part that didn't fit the diet so well. But ooo they tasted so good! My sister brought sugar-free jello. When Mom and I went to the store this morning, I could tell that my having a birthday cake was really important to her, so she and I worked together to put together a dessert that would be festive and still fit with my diet. I ended up with a very yummy angel food cake topped with bananas, sugar-free whipped topping, and sugar-free caramel topping. It tasted quite decadent, but I feel like it probably had far fewer calories than a traditional yellow cake with frosting.

Today's Tip:

My sister gave me a gift that I think is a great idea. She got me a rainbow colored placemat and matching bowls in various sizes, salad plate for my entrees (smaller size so I eat less than I would with a full-sized dinner plate), and mug. The purpose of the dishes and placemat is to ensure that every meal is a pleasant occasion no matter what I'm eating rather than a mindless boring act. And in another bag she put various treats to enjoy on my new dishes -- soups, bagels, fruits, salad, each having only one Weight Watchers point value. It was a great gift idea, particularly for a single person like me. When you eat alone, it's so easy for mealtime to become a mindless act done off a paper towel in front of the TV or at the kitchen counter. Dishes like this makes mealtime become more purposeful, and thus much easier to be aware of the content of the food, the calories, the nutrition, and the enjoyment of eating. If you know a single person, think about a gift like this the next time a special occasion arises in their lives. It's a great way to let them know how special they are to you!

24 Hours to Go Before OLD?, Week 28, Day 4

This is the final day before I turn 50. Seems like a good day to reflect on how I have spent my 40s and my youth in general. In the short-term, I weighed myself this morning, and I am at 198. So while I did not hit my 50 by 50 Challenge, I did make it under 200 pounds by my 50th birthday. Considering my dad's two stays in the hospitals and the multiple times we came so very close to losing him these past few weeks, I'll count this as a major triumph in my weight loss journey. I began last September at 259, so I've done pretty well. My next goal is to bring my total weight loss to 100 pounds by this coming September. I think that's very doable.

As for the longer-term view and how I spent my 40s, I look back and see some wasted time and some mistakes that distress me greatly. I missed some opportunities and trusted some people I shouldn't have. I didn't trust myself when I should have. I let myself down physically, too, and got huge. On the other hand, I've had some major accomplishments. In my 40s I worked with Senators Kennedy and Grassley, at their request, on the Family Opportunity Act, speaking at press conferences with them, appearing on CNN and CSPAN, doing TV and newspaper interviews, and in 2006, the bill was signed into law. I made a major career shift in my 40s, finding the courage to finally pursue my dreams. Because of that I am now a published author with many dozens of articles, two books, miscellaneous other pieces, and a couple of awards to my credit. It's not just what I want to be, it's what I do for a living. And most importantly, it has inspired my kids to pursue their dreams -- without waiting until their 40s to do so. And in my 40s I launched my kids into adulthood, gracefully became a loving mother-in-law, and enthusiastically became a grandma, letting it make me feel youthful again instead of feeling old. And I have ended my 40s by losing 61 pounds. With my great friends and family at my side, I think I'm ready to be 50.